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And even more importantly the people in Rio have something that New Yorkers don’t, which is why I moved.”“New Yorkers are cool, but their priorities center around their career. And it was immediately clear how some Brazilians—not all—were so much more loving and alive.

They smiled bigger, touched one another all the time, were incredibly loving and affectionate. And while not all New Yorkers are one way and all Brazilians are another, I found more of that loving, friendly nature here so I had to move.” With those few sentences, this person knows more pertinent information about me than they would if I read them my resume line by line.

I give a two-three line response to their initial question and only dive deeper once they ask further questions.

If they don’t ask, I don’t tell—I’m not trying to force feed them my worldview.

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I loved NYC, but the weather sucks for eight months out of the year so I can’t do the outdoor stuff I like.

And even more importantly, the people in Rio have something that New Yorkers don’t, which is why I moved.” All these are logical questions that people will ask.

He shares ideas backed by behavioral science for mastering your charisma in all situations, from the boardroom to a cocktail party.You’re going to have conversations that flow naturally and easily, regardless of who you’re talking to. It usually lasts a few minutes, you get the basic stuff out, then twiddle your thumbs because neither of you has anything left to say—or, more accurately, because neither of you engaged the other enough to inspire further conversation.Then the CEO or the girl or whoever it is you’re talking to excuses themselves politely and finds someone else to speak with.”) and answer them in a way that makes the other person want to continue the conversation.Let’s say you’re like me and your basic answer to, The only shot someone can respond enthusiastically to “NYC” is if they lived there, want to or know someone who does.

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